The Art of Being Called a Nigger

This week I had the amazing pleasure of being completely disrespected. And it forced me to reflect. I’ve always thought about how I would proceed with raising my boys in this new age racist world. But it’s never really hit me until this week, exactly what they could be dealing with. 

As an African American you watch movies on slavery and racism and what not. Then you look to your friends and say “man I’m so glad I didn’t grow up in those days because I would have…” not even really knowing that we had no idea what these men and women were up against. 

I got to talking to my friend on Facebook who shared a similar “nigger” slur this week. And the one thing that we both could agree on was how in shock we were at the time it happened. I mean she was called it to her face. In an uber pool at that! Which makes the situation a lot more scarier than someone disrespecting me over Facebook. I explained to Ashlee (hey girl hey!!) that I was so taken back. I read this message (see below) and couldn’t even speak it out loud. Coke was driving the car like, “what’s wrong, what happened” and I just couldn’t get the words out. 

It was both of our first times being called a nigger. And I was by far floored. I wasn’t even in the presence of this person but for some reason a sense of fear fell over me. I literally had to snap myself out of it. For some odd reason I felt uncertain of what my next move should be. For some reason I felt very nervous about my retaliation. I,for one, have never been at a loss for words. I’ve always had the comeback of the century on the tip of my tongue. But I didn’t even respond here. 

I thought about all those movies of my ancestors and fellow African Americans, and I said to myself, “Yo I feel you!” I’ve been in some racist situations before and I’ve been judge for the color of my skin. But never in my entire existence have I been scared to be black before. Scared to even defend myself. 

What did I do you ask? Well I emailed this person’s job and the social media groups that she belongs to and her husband to let them know the type of people they had representing them. I NEVER HEARD BACK! I tell people all the time that I’m raising my sons to know the difference between standing up for themselves and accepting today’s times. But now I’m second guessing if I even know the difference myself! 

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